I’m writing this from a Starbucks located in a suburb of Chicago. Yes, dear readers, I know what you’re thinking: “That’s nothing out of the ordinary for you.” You’re right. I love Starbucks, especially when the girl with the mole on her neck serves me my latte. My eyes, wild as they are, inevitably focus on it. She blushes and thinks to herself, “I serve you here each and every day, usually between the hours of 9 – 11 AM CST. And each and every day, you request a new name on your cup. Your real name, I know not. Are you running from the law? Have you no parents? And why do you always stare at my mole?” I proceed to think, “Was it not the Phoenicians . . . Or maybe the Corinthians, in a letter to the Apostle Paul, who expressed reverence for women with moles on their necks? Is this woman a sign pointing me back towards religious conformity? Her name is Mary, too! Either way you slice it, I’m the loser in this game!” I then look towards the floor, whisper “Thank you”, and stalk away, making sure I walk with a “hellafied gangsta lean.” . . . But you’re probably wondering why I’m writing this. I was just at MJ’s house and I have an exclusive interview with him after the “Read More”! BIG NEWS, Y’ALL.
Moid: Thanks for having me, Mr. Jordan.
Michael: Anything for a cute white boy.
Moid: Umm . . .
Michael: No homo.
Moid: Oh Mike, you sly dog! You had me there for a second!
(We both guffawed here.)
Mike: I’ve been foolin’ you white boys since I cris-crossed that guy from Cleveland in 1992.
Moid: Craig Ehlo?
Mike: How should I know? After a while, all you white guys start to run together and look alike.
Moid: So, um . . . why did we come together today? Would you like to ‘spill the beans’, as it were?
Michael: Hey, bet I can beat you in that game.
Moid: What game?
Michael: “Spill the Beans” . . .
Moid: Dude, you ruined Antoine Walker’s career and life with your “betting.” The only way I’ll agree to any sort of competition is if you promise to blackmail Stern into getting a 4-point line so my man can come back and start launchin’.
(Pause.)
Michael: Stern, unfortunately, has got more dirt on me than I’m willing to admit. Did you know I was forced into retirement because . . . (here, the fire alarm went off and I couldn’t hear MJ’s explanation. God blast his cigars!) I have no use for that li’l fella. He’d better utilized as seagull bait. Hey, wanna help me chain him up to a rock on this deserted island I own?
Moid: WTF, MJ?! Please, let’s try to stay on topic . . . You’re switching brands I hear?
Michael: You betcha. Somebody has to pay Juanita.
Moid: Say word?
Michael: Ho Grant used to say that in the team shower after practice . . . But, yes, Juanita (may Allah strike her dead) has taken so much from me after a woman called the home phone late one night asking if I was home. White womenz.
Moid: No pre-nup?
Michael: When you’re young and a woman can do the things with her lips that Juanita could do, marriage problems are the last thing on your mind.
Moid: So what’ll happen to Brand Jordan?
Michael: Well, in order to get ol’ girl off my back, I had to just give her the thing. It’ll remain how it is now, except the name and logo will be different.
Moid: So it’ll be very different, huh?
Michael: Define ‘very’ and ‘different’ and you have you have it. Why are you asking me questions you already know the answer to?
Moid: So, were Fusions your idea or what?
Michael: No, Gentry “The OG Killer” Humphrey thought of those. But I like them. And anybody that knows me knows that I know style.
Moid: Any thoughts on what logo might replace the Jumpman?
Michael: The silhouette of an underfed Asian kid would work marvelously.
Moid: Where are you going to go now that you’re not on Nike’s roster?
Michael: adidas.
Moid: adidas?
Michael: You know when we were growing up, adidas stood for “adidas” stood for ‘All day I dream about sex.’ Well, the thing is, I’ve been wearing adidas for years. I’ve taken that statement seriously. In the ‘90s, whenever we’d be on the road, I’d be trying to bring big-haired white girls into the Sheraton with me. During those romps I’d pull out that the adidas and go Dikembe Mutombo on those guts.
Moid: I wanna be like Mike!
Michael: Where do you think that song came from? (Michael winked here.)
Moid: So is this why Jeffrey chose to play at UCF? Adidas?
Michael: Me leaving the brand is a fairly recent development, actually. Jeff is just down there trying to get into some rich white girls. You know what we both like? When girls are wearing that spray-tan cream and it gets sweated off onto our bodies. Call me Reese’s Peanut Butter cup cuz I’m all chocolate and orange!
(LOLz all around!)
Moid: Why adidas?
Michael: Super light and super comfortable. Good enough to where they got me thinking about coming out of retirement.
Moid: Thanks for the time, Michael.
Michael: Anything for the Sneaker Files team and their devoted readership.
is this a joke?
Are yall serious?
does anybody fall for lame *** April Fools Day jokes anymore?
Dumb.
Jeremy Ripley is my hero!
**** this piece of **** interview it was probley with some randome *** guy he was ******* at starbucks ***** good ****
Uhh Jeffrey doesnt go to UCF. Marcus Jordan does. Im sitting here reading this after just smoking a blunt and I cant help but think about how high this guy had to be to write this.
**** YOU GUYS!!!
Almost had a fuckiin heartattack!
April Fools ( geninuses)
April fools rite
Lame
of course this is a joke, its april fools people, lighten up
haha not funny
wow…hella april fools…but I gotta admit I loled at the big haired white girl part…
Not funny and actually borderline racist
being biracial is great. you can laugh at anything. the asian thing not so much though. this was pretty funny if u ask me. but i like sick and twisted humor w/ a dash of lying.
Effing hi-larious!!! Great "interview"!
JUST DISSRESPECTFUL FIND SOMETHING BETTER TO DO WITH YOUR TIME OTHER THAN LYING ON THE INTERNET!!!!!!!
good idea for a joke but he should of made it more believable.
if this is a aprils fool its pretty lame kinda sad yu kno
this is a April's Fool joke!!! you didn't fool me!
lol @addicted2fresh
Terrible.
******* TERRIBLE, YOU NEED TO FIND YOURSELF A PET DUDE…
michael's son marcus plays at ucf, jeffrey decided to go to illinois….this thing was still funny all the same
april first=april fools lmao im not falling for iit
Hello! dkdbdab interesting dkdbdab site!
Very nice site! [url
if you're gonna try ******* with people on April fools you should probably make it a little more believable
**** sneakerfiles nice kicks is better lol.
all you'll who think this is fake Best BELIEVE mIkes shady i jus like his kicks check out how he did chamillionaire
muck fike
stupid *** people…
At the beginning
Early in 1984, Nike was a struggling shoe company. The running shoe phenomenon that has fueled their sales in previous years was slowly dying and they needed a way to revitalize and reinvent themselves in order to appeal to another segment of the market. At the same time, rookie player Michael Jordan was already endorsing several products, but Nike hoped that his appeal would generate sales. Jordan, though, had other ideas. He had always preferred Adidas or the Converse shoes endorsed by North Carolina Coach, Dean Smith, and hoped to sign on with either company. Converse, with Larry Bird and Magic Johnson on board as spokesmen, were not interested in offering a better deal than Nike, and Adidas wasn't interested at all at the time; perhaps due to Kathe Dassler's death the same year. While Jordan, himself, did not initially see the significance of Nike's offer, his agent, David Falk, saw a golden opportunity in Nike's offer to create a new line of shoes called "Air Jordans." and urged him to give Nike a chance.
Really Not That Interested
At that time, there was not a tremendous impact from a shoe endorsement, and few companies were willing to risk so much of their marketing budget to bet on one athlete to promote their products. An athlete as paid for wearing the products but little else resulted from an endorsement. It's possible that Jordan's reluctant attitude stemmed from this fact as much as his allegiance to Converse and Adidas products.
Nike saw something special in Michael Jordan, though. They saw a chance, an opportunity. He was a champion with personality, charisma, and heart, and they were willing to put the company on the line. They knew from the beginning that he would be a star and wanted to help him get there. Finally, after much persuasion from his manager and parents, the reluctant rookie agreed to fly to the Nike headquarters in Portland, Oregon to view a special video presentation and proposal though he later stated in retrospect that he went with no intention of signing with Nike.
The video presentation featured slow-motion clips of Jordan's college career and some of his high-flying Olympic moves with a background of then hit music "Jump" by the Pointer Sisters. Nike Head Designer, Peter Moore presented sketches of AJ1 shoes, jumpsuits, and sports apparel, all in black and red. Michael's remarks upon seeing the designs were less than enthusiastic. He is reported to have said,
"I can't wear that shoe, those are Devil colors"
Throughout the entire meeting Jordan was reported to seem disinterested and bored, but as he and Falk left the meeting, Jordan said to his agent, "Let's make the deal."
A Legacy (and a Controversy) is Born
With those four words, the Air Jordan legacy was born. Nike signed Jordan to a $2.5 million deal for 5 years, plus royalties and other fringe benefits. Peter Moore created the first AJ Logo with a basketball with wings lifting it. The introduction of the Air Jordan I turned the athletic shoe industry upside down. Before the AJ I, most basketball shoes were white, but the bold black and red styling of the Jordan I flouted this convention. The NBA banned the shoe from the league in response, but Jordan wore them anyway, racking up serious fines of up to $5000 a game. Nike, of course, was more than happy to pay these to keep the shoes on Jordan's feet and in the public eye. All this controversy and Jordan's spectacular numbers that year served to put the Air Jordan line on the road to becoming a household name.
Changes
After winning 1986-87 Slam Dunk competition at Seattle Coliseum, the Jordan logo changed to the familiar Jumpman logo of today, but when it came time to talk about the Air Jordan III, Michael was ready to bolt. Reaction to the Air Jordan II, due in part to the high retail price, hadn't been stellar and designers Peter Moore and Rob Strasser had left Nike to start their own company. They began to court Jordan, hoping to develop the business around him This was a turning point for the line; a make-it-or-break-it moment. It was at this time that Tinker Hatfield stepped in to help the struggling shoe line. Immediately, Hatfield did something completely new and unheard of. His first instinct was to sit down and talk with Michael one on one and ask for his input about the design. Hatfield has stated that this was a very tense time. No one had ever approached the business of designing a shoe like this and Jordan had never had anyone ask his opinion until that time. Ultimately, though, it was the good advice of Michael's father that saw it through. It's reported that he advised his son to stay with the people who had done a good job for him. Eventually the process of designing the shoes and matching apparel drew Jordan in and helped reinforce his commitment to Nike. At Jordan's request, the Air Jordan III was a three-quarter cut basketball shoe made of high quality, lighter than average materials. This non-standard approach to the process of designing basketball shoes led the Air Jordan III to rocket off the charts with its popularity, and Tinker went on to design all the Jordan models up to the Jordan XV. With the release of the Air Jordan XV and Jordan's second retirement, both Hatfield and Jordan stepped back from the Jordan line and other designers took the reigns to continue to the legacy.
Moving Out
Air Jordan Shoes were a part of the Nike, Inc. family until late in 1997 Nike unveiled a new marketing plan and Jordan became its own sub-brand of Nike. To mark this change, the new Jordan Brand released the Air Jordan XIII, Air Jordan Team, and Air Jordan Trainers. From this point on, Jordan Brand products no longer featured the Nike name or Nike Swoosh, and their only connection to Nike,Inc is a fine print address for Nike headquarters to be used for insurance purposes.
The Shoes Changed the World
Air Jordan shoes have consistently been among the best selling basketball shoes since their creation in 1985. The Jordan brand is a household name and people of all ages and social strata line up eagerly for the release of the latest model. Some of this success can be attributed to the fact that the shoes, from the Jordan III to the most recent model, have always started with their namesake, Michael Jordan. The designers take his ideas, hobbies, and life into account and incorporate these feelings into the shoes. A number of Jordans have been designed after Jordan's cars and some of the more recent models, like the Jordan XXI (Jordan 21) on the way, some wonder when the Air Jordan line will be retired while others speculate that, in honor of the man, the last Air Jordan will be the Jordan XXIII (Jordan 23). No matter what happens to the signature Air Jordan line, it's a good bet that the brand and its tradition of quality, high-fashion basketball and athletic shoes will continue long after Air Jordans have retired.
Jordan 1-Jordan 2010 liston this website
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